Sleep Training Zoe (And Everyone Else...)

I think one of the hardest things about motherhood, for me, is never getting enough sleep. It's probably because I'm doing everything horribly wrong. But that's how it is.

Zoe and Daphne both tricked me by starting out as really great sleepers. By about 2 months they were starting to "sleep through the night" which at that age I counted as any stretch of at least 6 hours. But they both quickly increased that 6 hours to about 10-12. Until around 5 or 6 months old, when they decided to go back to waking up every three hours or so. Just long enough for me to get used to it, and hate my life when they switched back.

With Daphne, though, I refused to nurse her back to sleep, because the pediatrician said, "She's old enough to make it through the night without eating, just stop feeding her and she'll stop waking up." Wrong. She kept waking up until she was about a year old, and that was when we moved into our current house, where she had her own room (instead of sharing ours) and I finally just let her cry. Within a couple nights she was back to sleeping through the night. Yay! My problems were over!

Until she turned 2 and wouldn't fall asleep on her own, so Steve or I had to sit next to her bed every night until she fell asleep - for the next three years! That's right, we finally put an end to that when she turned 5, and told her (lovingly, and encouragingly, I hope) that she was old enough to fall asleep on her own now. And she's been doing that ever since. Though she still tells me most nights that she doesn't like it when I leave. So I feel a little guilty about that. But not guilty enough to stay.

Poor Alex got the heartless mother-of-a-second-child-sleep-training. Unlike his sisters he never slept through the night on his own. By 6 months he was still up every few hours to nurse, so I decided to cut him off and let him cry. Okay so I wasn't completely heartless - at first. I would only let him cry 5-10 minutes, then go in and hold him and sing to him, then let him cry again, then go back, etc. until he fell asleep. After a few nights he was doing all right on his own. Then I think around 18 months-ish he started waking up at night again. (Maybe because that's when I threw his pacifiers away?) This is when I got heartless. Turned off the baby monitor and went back to sleep. Every night. Zoe was coming, and then she was born, and so I just stopped turning on the baby monitor at night. When we finally moved him out of the crib and into a regular bed, he started sneaking into our bed every night. And he still does. Actually, first he started running screaming and crying down the hall, and stopping just outside our door and crying until we let him in. Then he would come in on his own and fall asleep on the recliner chair in our room. That was nice. THEN he started sneaking in our bed. Which was okay, except that he's a pretty active sleeper and might end up sleeping on your back and face and legs and neck. And sometimes by morning he will be upside down with his head under the covers. So he is my next sleep training project.

But for now I'm working on Zoe! And for now it's going great! Unlike Daphne, I have been nursing Zoe any and every time she wakes up at night. Because it's just easier. So her sleep training is both weaning her off of night feedings, and getting her to fall asleep on her own.

The Plan - If she wakes up, pick her up and hum "You Are My Sunshine". Put her back in her crib and leave the room. Let her cry for 5 minutes. Return and repeat until she falls asleep. Do this every time she wakes up unless it's after 5:00am. Then she's allowed to be awake. I guess. At least it sounds like a reasonable morning time, more than a middle of the night time.

Night One:
She went to bed about 8:00. Woke up crying at 10:30. I picked her up and hummed the song. Put her back down and SHE WENT RIGHT BACK TO SLEEP! Woo hoo! But don't celebrate just yet because then she woke up at 12:30. And when I put her back down she cried the full 5 minutes. Then I came back and picked her up and hummed the song and she cried again when I left. And again and again and again for the next hour. Then she fell asleep. Then she woke up at 4:45 so I held her off 15 minutes and then nursed her and then she went back to sleep until I think 6:30am. So overall about what I expected for the first night. Maybe even a little better.

Night Two:
SHE SLEPT FROM 8:30 TO 6:00!

Night Three:
She woke up around 3:00 in the morning. I hummed the song and put her down and she went right back to sleep. Yay!

Night Four:
She slept from 8:30 TO 5:00! WHAT?!?!? AM I DREAMING?!

So it's going pretty well so far. I'm hoping we can keep this up. And then get Alex to stay in his room all night. And then I just might be able to sleep for once. Wouldn't that be something...