Thursday, April 10, 2008

Suspicious Activities

Steve and Christie were last seen fleeing the state of Utah. According to airport security, both had legitimate boarding passes, but a check to the Southwest computer system just three hours before their flight proved that only Steve was planning to fly that night.

"It was just a last minute decision," explains Christie. "Steve was visiting me in Provo, and instead of going back alone, he asked if I wanted to go with him. Since I recently finished at BYU, I had nothing holding me back. Of course I agreed to go with him!"

Plausible, perhaps, if the couple had not checked FOUR suitcases for their "weekend getaway". When questioned about the unusual amount of luggage, Steve confirmed that Christie's visit was unplanned, and would only last five days. The suitcases, he claimed, were full of clothes, books and other possessions that she was moving to his new apartment in Martinez. Allegedly, the couple are getting married in a few weeks and wanted to get things in order early so they could more fully enjoy their wedding celebrations.

Behind all their smiles and ready explanations, Christie's behavior is still questionable. After Steve left for work, she spent the morning searching every corner of the apartment. What exactly was she looking for? Money? Stolen jewels? Traces of blood? We bugged her cell phone to find out. Here's a transcript of what we heard:

Steve: Hello?
Christie: Hi! How's work?
Steve: It's fine. So you're using your new phone?
Christie: Yeah, I took some pictures with it, of the apartment, to show my mom.
Steve: Oh good. So what else have you been doing?
Christie: Well, I searched the place for spiders.
Steve: Did you find any?
Christie: Five so far, there could be more.
Steve: I'm so sorry! I don't know what to do
Christie: Don't worry, I'll take care of them.

Unfortunately, our eavesdropping inspired more questions than answers. What are these "spiders" and why do they have Steve so worried? How exactly did Christie plan to "take care of them" and why did a neighbor, who prefers to remain anonymous, report hearing Christie tell Steve when he got home that she "freaked out" and "killed them when they tried to get back in the house"?

"They were really just spiders," Christie told reporters, "just regular eight-legged spiders. Well, OK, one of them only had seven legs, but you know what I mean!"

No, Christie, we don't.

4 comments:

Annie said...

Its hard for me to describe my excitement that you have a blog now. I will be checking back often. Love ya!

Stephanie Lonas - Wanderlively said...

BAHAHA. Best blog post EVER.

Siggy said...

You guys crack me up! I am so glad that I found your blog! I love blogging!

David said...

haha nice christie NICE